SickBitchCrips are delighted to announce that they were shortlisted for Diversity 13 which is a commission to explore diversity in 2013 and to put on a performance for 15 nights at Ovalhouse, London.
Today the SickBitchCrips are delighted to accept rejection having failed to be offered the commission. It was felt that they wouldn't be able to sustain a three-week audience.
SickBitchCrips are convinced it would have been a piece of cake, putting posteriors on seats. They accept that their art is elitist and tends to favour a disability discourse, but they firmly believe that their work is accessible to all, including disabled people.
SickBitchCrips are not bitter or twisted in a metaphorical way, they just are.
So what else? SickBitchCrips Facebook birth on December 3rd 2012, declare that their fan base has spiralled out of control and reached a staggering 45 likes. With their rapid rise in popularity, they are confident that they will continue to feed their stalkers with culinary delights that will quench taste buds and have their disciples wailing for more of the same.
Every waking hour SickBitchCrips scour the internet to find other potential SickBitchCrips as physically challenging and demanding as themselves. They are ecstatic when they find others much worse off. The only criteria is that the inflicted are still breathing one way or another. There were lots of angels out there but sadly they have all scarpered.
Tragic tear jerking stories and seldom happy endings are all part of the formula to raise money to eradicate SickBitchCrips.
But SickBitchCrips are fighting back and are intent on procreation and staying alive. The dangers of eluding death begin in the womb and the first hurdle is to evade the death trap of prenatal screening. If they manage to succeed, the next obstacle to avoid is having the doctor advocating a court order to authorise ventilation to be switched off . The quality of life of a working brain inside a limp body is regarded as useless by people who sadly are unable to comprehend quality without movement.
SickBitchCrips deplore people deciding the morality of their lives so have decided to take matters into their own hands.
To kick off the New Year SickBitchCrips received a wonderful generically personalised Happy New Year message from their close friends the ILF (Independent Living Friend), as seen in the image.
SickBitchCrips are excited about the future and are rapidly making plans to find ingenious ways of maintaining their independent living budget to continually pay for their 24-hour servant needs.
As with all of us, they are severely concerned that their funding will shrink – and under such tragic circumstances SickBitchCrips may be forced to pay below the minimum wage. SickBitchCrips advocate doing everything illegally and are inspired by Stephen Fry's antics over the Christmas period in which he and his comrades staged a heist from the National gallery of Scotland. For inspirational ideas click on the following link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doors_Open
The positive side to all of this is that SickBitchCrips are acutely aware that once their cash is handed over to the local authority, disabled people can feel proud that they will be supporting their local authority employees.
There will be an admin team created to manage the funding, a few new employees to link this team with another team (multidisciplinary approach!), a few managers, coordinators and obviously an assistant director.... And all the money will be gone for salaries for this efficient team!
SickBitchCrips intend to organise trafficking for their 24 hour servant needs and will be operating on the black market. So if your funding is slashed and you need assistance, SickBitchCrips will find you your perfect slave!
All commission to SickBitchCrips Ltd.
SickBitchCrips are ecstatic at the launch of their long awaited Facebook page
SickBitchCrips Facebook page archives all their digital images and videos, so now there is no excuse not to have seen their erudite work.
For the ultimate Christmas gift, treat yourself to a viewing of the SickBitchCrip Facebook page, full of fantastic videos and digital images.
Strongly recommended for those who are sick of the cliched world of disability and want to elevate to a new and refreshing level
SickBitchCrips have had an uneventful self-indulgent Christmas during which they have gorged non-stop for 48 hours. They are confident that they have gobbled enough to prepare themselves for severe funding cuts which will impinge on their appetites in 2013 and will have an impact on what champagne they greedily guzzle.
They received hundreds of presents which included a bird perched on a twig and a wicker work stool, all of these gifts have been carefully redirected to a charity to help the diseased and afflicted.
SickBitchCrips new years message is 'Express Yourselves'
The cute bitches in the Christmas image represent a time of austerity and are a constant reminder that however pitiful your circumstances may be – in 2013 you will be even worse off. They strongly advise you to be prepared for the onslaught of hideous assessments and make sure that you downsize your fridge, television, cochlear implant, bed, wheelchair, bath, sink, art works, colostomy bag and other non-essentials to Cripple up to a level that you didn't believe possible.
Remain static and be vigilant, invest in tracheotomies, peg feeding, life-support machines and surgical blunders. Daily invasive procedures may sound a little daunting at first but for hard times ahead SickBitchCrips insist on these measures that will set you in good stead and precipitate the decrease in your funding.
SickBitchCrips are anxious and concerned about rumours of a new Crip on the block. Her name is Miss Scoliosis! SickBitchCrips have become accustomed to hogging the limelight and whispers have left them feeling utterly dismayed. They are hoping that Miss Scoliosis embraces the medical model, only making an appearance when Charity has raised enough funds to buy Miss Scoliosis a specially adapted wheelchair that she can drive off Beachy Head; or maybe a holiday for the handicapped in Lourdes where she will be cured and become normal. SickBitchCrips are out of their minds trying to find ways to get rid of her. They are hoping that maybe she's interested in going on an all expenses paid holiday to Zürich, never to return. They are currently in talks with the BBC, Sky and any other TV companies who are happy to sensationalise and film Miss Scoliosis ending her treacherous life.
In the meantime SickBitchCrips have cobbled together their heart-warming Christmas film which will entertain and simultaneously teach us the invaluable principle of inclusivity. SickBitchCrips have been forced to air their Christmas special prematurely in the hope that the gaze will revert back to them and that Miss Scoliosis will simply vanish without trace.
SickBitchCrips have an affinity towards Rudolph the red nosed reindeer, which is why they have hijacked and exploited cute little Rudolph for a cameo role in their first ever SickBitchCrips Christmas special. SickBitchCrips are strong believers in the Christmas spirit and firmly believe that Christmas is about binging and purging on people that dare to misunderstand them.
Miss Scoliosis believes that she has an 'invisible disability' but SickBitchCrips know that she's a twisted fucker! Miss Scoliosis is known to operate under a multitude of diseases and although severe curvature of the spine is one of her traits, SickBitchCrips are paranoid that Miss Scoliosis may have against all the odds managed to infiltrate and have the audacity to appear in their SickBitchCrips Christmas special.
Miss Scoliosis is determined to be visible despite SickBitchCrips crippling intentions towards her demise. Miss Scoliosis is a fighter and believes there is a battle ahead and she will win it even if it does mean playing dirty and taking on multiple disabilities. Miss Scoliosis is delighted with her appearance on SickBitchCrips Christmas special and is waiting for further opportunities to sabotage and hijack their work.
For those of you who haven’t yet heard of SBC I am going to gently introduce you to us. SickBitchCrips is an arts organisation made up of the most severely afflicted, contagious and diseased artists who have multiple disorders i.e. myself and any other specimens who feel they meet this hierarchal criteria.
Extreme physical movement is forbidden and SickBitchCrips has no time for anatomically perfect people. We have been heavily involved in producing posters of late that are in par with those beautifully crafted images of the foot and mouth painters association. We intend to bring out a Christmas special something sometime soon and to get a taste of the wonderfully courageous work we do I have included an image with this blog.
Due to our severe limitations we can take rather a long time to produce work, some may refer to our work as 'durational' but we see it as 'inspirational'. We believe the end result is worth it and we have some very important messages to put out there for anyone brave enough to engage.
Similar to Damien Hirst and others we think about our work and what our next piece will be about, we have an affinity towards Damien because his work is about life and death and we believe our work is comparable to his but we tend to lean more towards imminent death.
I am dying to tell you about the Christmas special something we intend to do but I have to hold back and try not to get overly excited because like many other artists we struggle, I mean seriously struggle to stay alive and continue to make work. It's not easy facing our daily tragic circumstances and SickBitchCrips embraces your pity and welcomes language that sees us as special, brave and amazing.
Our mission is to be ghettoised and denied access to pretty much everything. SickBitchCrips is deserving, needy and our special needs will not hold us back from making mediocre art.
Having been inspired by the Paralympics paraphernalia of London 2012 as an audience participant in the Opening Ceremony and watching the Closing Ceremony on TV. Subjected to relentless coverage of inspirational stories and super humans doing amazing things, we were all suffering from the Paralympics one way or another.
I certainly was inspired by the tremendous atmosphere of the Olympic village and the 'hype the public' tactics to increase viewing figures. So when I was invited to do a performance for LUPA (lock up performance art) it felt only right to do a performance along the theme of the Paralympics.
I also felt this was my second chance to get involved with the Olympic frenzy as earlier this year I had received an official e-mail asking if I would be interested in performing in the ceremony as part of a core team of wheelchair performers. I was devastated when my pre-booked holiday dates clashed with the 30 something days of rehearsals and sadly had to decline.
But I was now the instigator, visionary and artistic director of my very own Closing Down Ceremony and okay I failed to get professor Hawking on my team but I did get Anne Redmond (artist) and Marja Commandeur (long-term suffering PA) in my core team. The exceptional talent that all three of us possessed culminated in a hyped up frenzied state of euphoria coupled with a grim, sardonic atmosphere, perfect for my interpretation of the closing ceremony.
The audience was labelled with categorisation of their Olympic impairment and inspirational words. They excitedly followed us into the garage and were then locked inside. Only a few elite people will ever know what happened inside that garage on the night of 28 September 2012