I came out of my self-enforced reclusion this week. The reason I went into one is that I have my holiday from uni at the moment and I wanted to use the time writing and give time to many neglected writing projects. Today I went to an event organised by the London Hearing Voice Groups Project. I told them a little bit about my story about hearing voices. I have heard them since I was 14 and although it is less now, they are still present. It wasn't until very recently did I realise I have control. I can't control the voices but I can control whether I listen to them. Sometime I argue with them. 'If they say negative stuff, like 'you're stupid'. I respond. 'I have done so many amazing things, like write books, etc, so therefore your argument is weak!' What has been most valuable is listening to my voice, not one created by an abusive childhood, or an uncaring mental system and society, but one I would be proud of. I see voices as radio stations, if the program is rubbish, I will create my own that says Dolly, you can do anything you set your mind too, and live a truly remarkable life. So far, so good...
Just to respond to some of the comments, the next Mad Chix will probably be next year, and it comes as no suprise to me that the anagram of Karl Malden's name came out that way. It would have surprised me if it didn't turn out that way.
Finally, I like giving talks, reading, performances, so if you would like me to do something at your event, as long as my travel is paid, and I am fed, I'd be happy to do them - as long as my busy allows,
love as always, Dolly x
I have a problem, maybe somebody can help me out here.
Hello! I have a minor problem: I am not human. I look like a human, I pretend to be one but I am not one. I am really a barking star, rejected by the skies because I bark. They cast me down to earth in human form. After 37 years of this form, I am beginning to get fed up. Wearing this human skin is like wearing a pair of knickers that keeps getting stuck up my bum. I have been labeled mad but I am not - I am a barking star. Should I stop this pretence or carry on with it in order to be accepted?
I haven't been blogging for a while because I have been running around like a headless chicken both at uni and in organising the mad chicks gig at corsica. We have been given crazy projects such as making 50 films in 5 days. I am production designer on my current project and I have to make a room - and its furniture - entirely out of cardboard, including the computer! Jeez. We are need a large space to construct this room, so if anybody can help us out, please drop me a line.
The highlight of the week was the mad chicks gig last sunday. Everything went smoothly, more than that magic was created and everyone there felt it. I am not quite sure how the magic was created. Every act exploded with intense essense, I think that helped but the mysterious ingredient is unnameable. I did the organising with one of my best friends Melanie. I am all raw energy and she is like the man in 'one man and his doggone chaos theory' guiding me like a shephard into a form the rest of the world can understand. She is great with detail. Numbers and logic make me want to dance into the nearest padded room. So we make a good team. Thanks to everyone else though, couldn't have done it without you.