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This week I have been put on some new meds for some recently developed epilepsy, and my mind has done some thinking on it that I am not sure would have arisen if I wasn’t taking these new drugs.

Now with Epilepsy on top of Psychosis, I am doubly ‘disabled’ but how come I don’t get twice my DLA? I have also come to the thought that prospective employers are gonna love me!

I went to a DAO meeting today, and we talked about spaceships, and Colin recreated the universe into something that could fit onto page. Did that really happen?

I also had a dream last night that aliens in trilby hats were going to invade earth with Karl Malden as their leader. Is this connected with the previous comment somehow?

I also realized that the dreamer and the dreamed are the same thing. That the dreamer dreamed a dreamer who dreamed a dreamer, etc.

Also, despite never drumming in my life, I bought a drum kit just because Animal from the Muppets has one.

Or maybe these thoughts are less crazy than the ones I have usually!

Posted by , 1 February 2008

Last modified by Colin Hambrook, 21 June 2009


Apart from being at art school studying film, I do lots of other things. When I am not depressed my mind swings into hypomania and I have to do 15 things at once if I want to avoid the almost physical pain of doing nothing.

One of the things I am doing is putting on a Mad Chicks gig. Mad Chicks started in 2004 as the girly wing of Mad Pride by Melanie Clifford, Gini Simpson, Esther Leslie, Sarah Tonin, Esther Wheatley, Rachel Studley, Penny Shaughnessy and Debbie McNamara, and of course me.

Mad Chicks is a movement, which focuses on issues specific to women mental health service users, using creativity to achieve our aims and attract attention to our causes. We have developed from within Mad Pride, an international user-led movement which challenges discrimination and misinformation in relation to mental health and celebrates mad culture. We have put on 3 events so far.

And celebrate it we do. On March 9th at Corsica Studios we are going to publicly and beautifully 'lose it' with such acts as
Melanie Clifford
Rachel Anderson
Stephanie Something
Ana da Silva
Liz Bentley
Drunk Granny
Rai Studley
Corey Orbison
Walki’s Monster

Ana da Silva, if you didn't know, was part of the legendary punk band The Raincoats, apparently one of Kurt Cobain's favourite bands, and one of mine too!

Come to the gig and give you a serotonin orgasm with a wild night of music, poetry, comedy and film at Corsica Studios.

Add yourself as a friend at
Our website is at

Posted by , 1 February 2008

Last modified by Colin Hambrook, 21 June 2009


digital artwork of a drowning eye

I am very pissed off at the moment. I do voluntary work for allsorts of mental health campaigning organisations such as the infamous Southwark Mind. I went to a meeting there yesterday and we talked about the closure of the Amardeep Project in my home borough of Lambeth, south London. Amardeep is a drop in centre for people of SE Asia origin. Amardeep is cultrally specific and supportive, run by staff of the same cultural background. It proved to be really popular to a cultural group who feel very alienated in the community.

After the inquest into Rocky Bennett and why too many Black men die in psychiatric care, it was found out that the mental health system is racist. Report after report said one of the ways forward is to provide culturally specific projects. There are other reasons to provide these. People from ethnic backgrounds don't engage well with mental health services. And young Asian women have the highest rate of suicide in this country.

What especially pisses me off is that they didn't just shut it just like that. They put a person who didn't speak any SE Asian languages in charge of the Amardeep Project, so people stopped going to the drop-in, and then said there was no demand for the service, and no point in it carrying on.

So actually maybe mental health services are not stupid but manipulative and cowardly, which unfortunately is nothing new. It is psychiatry's essential character. But it makes me mad!

Posted by , 1 February 2008

Last modified by ben paley, 10 July 2008